Very strange week behind me.

I thought I was well after my bout of sickness over the last weekened, I guess not? I’ve been cold all the time. My body’s felt tired and exhausted. My head’s been tired and exhausted. My appetite has been completely out of whack. I didn’t eat anything all of Monday (and I’m not the kind of person who lose my appetite, it was WEIRD) and then I struggled with that the whole week, though I feel better and back to normal now. I’ve had a lot of anxiety that I’ve been unable to connect to anything.

I went to the gym Monday and Tuesday but then I gave myself the rest of the week off to focus on getting more sleep. It feels like I made the right decision. I never checked my temperature so I don’t know if I had a fever or not.
The weirdest thing though? When I summarize my week like this and look at it I go OH MY GOD WOMAN WHY DIDN’T YOU JUST STAY HOME AND RECOVER. Why didn’t I? Because in the moment, from hour to hour I felt fine enough. Because I had a bunch of things that needed to get done. Because I didn’t think my anxiety would be improved by going home. Lots of stuff that all felt reasonable. Maybe it was reasonable in a way, but it goes to show that getting adequate rest and recovery, taking a break when you need it, is just as hard as getting to the gym when you need to and putting in the hard work.

I often joke about my stellar Lutheran work ethic when I feel guilty for taking time off, my impression is that I’m not alone in this, whether we believe in a higher power or not we’re all affected by cultures that stem from a religious world-view, culture and history. I feel a post about The Lutheran Work Ethic coming on. Max Weber you better watch out.